Learning to fly

Chris and Anna are wonderful friends of ours, the type of people that really live their lives and enjoy each moment for what it is. Last year we went on a back country snow trip with them. We hiked through the snow, out to Tantangara in the Kosciuszko National Park, to a rustic little drovers shack. The hike out was about 4 hours, through snow and sleet carrying about 15 kgs in our packs plus our snow boards. Needless to say when we got there we were well and truly ready for a good old fashioned sit down and a cup of tea! Chris, however, is the sort of person who was only getting warmed up and rushed back out into the snow to hike up some big hills and ride down them.

Chris and Anna came to stay last night on their way to the Blue Mountains for another adventure. It was great catching up with them because as they live in Queanbeyan we don’t see as much of them as we’d like and we really enjoy their stories when we do get together.

We knew Chris and Anna recently spent their honeymoon in Victoria; what we didn’t know is that they were learning how to paraglide for the most of their time there. So over dinner we spoke about Bald Hill at Stanwell Tops and Hill 60 at Pork Kembla and the conditions they would need to make it work for paragliding. This morning, with all of seven hours’ experience solo paragliding up his sleeve, we watched as Chris harnessed up, set up his wing, and jumped … well, more like floated, off Hill 60.

As he drifted about like a bird in the sky I got to wondering about the different ways we approach our fears. Chris doesn’t have any less fear than the rest of us, he simply has a need to tame it, to learn more, and to move forward in life without that fear ever stopping him or getting in his way of living.  All of you have heard the saying “Courage is not the absence of fear, it’s feeling the fear and doing it anyway” or words to that effect.  I really believe that’s where Chris differs from the average Joe, he chooses to face his fears and he knows with absolute conviction that once they are faced they will diminish.

When we talk about fear, all of us are afraid of something. The key is actually identifying and acknowledging that fear. In my coaching course, three universal fears are described, and we say that every fear we will ever have can be put into one of these categories.

1. Not being enough – We fear that we don’t have the skills, resources, courage or abilities that we need to move forward and face our challenge.

2. Not being loved – We fear that we won’t receive the love that we need to be complete and to grow as a human being.

3. Not being accepted – We fear that we won’t fit into a certain group or setting and will always be alone.

Think of the things that you are afraid of, instantly. Something will have popped into your mind. Use this time to address and acknowledge that fear. What category does that fear fit into?

Now that you have a fear that you need to address and resolve, I want you to write down three things which, if you did, would have the fear evaporate. Three things that once you have done, you will know with absolute certainty that the fear will never be an issue again.

Once you have those three things listed, get someone on board to help you get through it. There is a reason this fear has invaded you, and you need not be alone when tackling it! Phone a good friend and ask for their support with this, it will make the process so much easier knowing you have a friend involved.

Good luck with addressing your fear, and I hope that you’ve found within yourself the courage to fly!

If you’re really ready to step up and start living life and need a little assistance to get started, please give me a call on 4296 9331 or email me and we can work on it together. If you like what I’m writing or would like to give me some feedback, I’d love to hear from you. Shoot me an email at jodie@advancedcoachingsolutions.com.au