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by The Goose

New Indiana Jones Trailer

Irreverent, sexist and definitely not politically correct

 Old Man’s Physical

A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor for a physical.

The GP runs some tests and says: “Everything seems to be in top nick physically - but what about mentally and how is your connection with God?”

The man replies: “Oh me and God? We’re tight. We have a real bond, he’s really good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom, he turns on the light for me, and then, when I leave, he turns it back off.”

The doctor is astonished. Later he calls the man’s wife and says: “I’d like to speak to you about your husband’s supposed connection with God. He tells me that every night when he needs to use the loo, God turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves. Is this true?”

Exasperated wife: “No, the idiot keeps peeing in the refrigerator!”

It’s a Fact

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.

The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley’s gum.

 

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Updated 01-06-2011

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